Two

I love things that come in sets of more than one so when I saw these chairs while at the park this summer I couldn't resist. A laptop was the big edition to our family this Christmas (no, it's not mine I've got to wait until I've at least been accepted to a college to be able to argue for one of those). Along with this new laptop came a photo editor...not quite as sophisticated as photoshop but I'll have fun with it :-) There are so many things I could write on this blog about what I'm up to right now but it would take way too long and would tap into other emotions I really don't feel like wrestling with right now. Just know (who ever you are that happen to read this blog) that I'm tired of "the norm" and can't wait until I have the freedom I'm so desperately craving.

iTunes: Don't Stop The Music by Rihanna

Two Heads Are Better Than One

I'm not sure my aunt who is the mother of my twin cousins would say "two heads are better than one"... These 2 1/2 year old twins as well as their 7 year old sister are part of the reason I want to go to school in Chicago. There is NEVER a dull moment in their house that's for sure! I had a great time going to the zoo with them while I was in Chicago. Their responses to the various things they saw were just too funny like Maddie asking if the polar bear was going to hatch from the "egg" which actually was just a big white ball... Or Jake repeating 50 times in a row until someone acknowledged him "LOOK LOOK LOOK the bear's over dere" (not to be confused with over THere). Like I said never a dull moment.



iTunes: Ser o Parecer by R.B.D.

The City

City of Blinding Lights
U2

The more you see the less you know
The less you find out as you grow
I knew much more then than I do now

Neon heart, day-glow eyes
The city lit by fireflies
They're advertising in the skies
For people like us

And I miss you when you're not around
I'm getting ready to leave the ground

Oh you look so beautiful tonight...

Don't think before you laugh
Look ugly in a photograph
Flash bulbs, purple irises the camera can't see

I've seen you walk unafraid
I've seen you in the clothes you've made
Can you see the beauty inside of me?
What happened to the beauty I had inside of me?

And I miss you when you're not around
I'm getting ready to leave the ground

Oh you look so beautiful tonight...tonight
In the city of blinding lights

Time...time....time...won't leave me as I am
But time won't take the boy out of this man
Oh you look so beautiful tonight
Oh you look so beautiful tonight
Oh you look so beautiful tonight

Philly Girl

If you know anything about ML Baseball you know that the Philadelphia Phillies are infamous for going on streaks in which they bring their fans to hope that maybe just maybe this year we'll it make to to the playoffs....and if you really know anyhting about the Phillies you'll know that they haven't done so in 14 years UNTIL this Sunday. I having lived for basically my entire life in Philly am a die hard Phillies fan and have had my hopes dashed for the last 14 years of seeing my wonderful team in the playoffs until this year when we WON the NL East Championship. I watched the game on Sunday with my dad while flipping back to the Mets game to see if they were loosing (thank goodness they did!) and holding my breath almost praying the Phillies wouldn't choke like so many times before. When Brett Myers threw the final strike to end the game 6-1 I along with the city of Philadelphia went crazy. FINALLY We've done! Between jumping up and down and running around the living room I managed to call my cousin a die hard Braves fan to (for the first time EVER) rub in his face what MY team did!

In case you haven't been able to tell I've been taken by the playoff fever that has infected about 99.999% of Philadelphia. I'm exstatic to see my team in the playoffs! I took these picture when I went to a Phillies vs Mets game in August and believe it or not the Phillies won and it was the first game I had ever been to that they had done so and I've been to many Phillies games so that's really saying something!! I'm so pumped right now for my team, my school is even having "Phillies Day" tomorrow which is a miracle unto its self!



iTunes: A Song For You by Elliott Yamin

A Light Still Burns

This week has gone in a blur of papers, pens, uniforms, and soccer balls (HA). Our first full week of school has been very tiring and despite the massive load of work I have I'm content. I had my first club soccer game of the season last night and I had a BLAST! It was so great to be back with the girls from last year and to be playing at a level so different from school. I missed playing soccer with these girls so much over the last many months since I got sidelined with an injury back in January. I've ALMOST finished my Wheaton application and I'm submitting the soccer recruiting form tomorrow. The week is winding down and I'm not complaining that's for sure I'm looking forward to catching up on some sleep and pleasure reading for a little while this weekend! But even better I have soccer practice tomorrow night!!!!



iTunes: It Ain't Me, Babe by Joaquin Phoenix and Reese Witherspoon from Walk the Line (soundrack)

Jumble

School started on Monday, we went to school for a grand total of three days and now have two days off for Jewish holidays. Gotta love the Philly school district! I'm insanely overwhelmed right now and I was looking through my pictures trying to find one to match how I'm feeling right now but none fit. My teachers are already giving out assignments as if we'd never gone on vacation and having to get my application to Wheaton done and retake my standardized tests has left me feeling like curling up in my bed and just waiting until it's all over. My thoughts are running at about a thousand a minute and everything ends up one big jumble. I found this picture online and thought it was just perfect. I wish I could take credit for it but...




iTunes: Help! by The Beatles

Beligian chocolate really does live up to it's reputation I'd never had such amazing chocolate EVER in my life before going to Brussels. Now, two months after coming back I still have most of it (which was showing amazing restraint on my part as well as my mom and sisters). I've been saving it to eat with my best friend. Despite being back for over a month we have yet to see each other. She's been working down the shore and our family schedules haven't let us hang out but we have talked on the phone or via the internet almost everyday. Tomorrow night we're finally going to hang out!!!! I'm really excited just to be able to talk to her. There are alot of things we've hinted to each other about but didn't want to talk about over the phone because that's just not quite personal enough for us (and we also didn't want our big earred sisters to be listening in). When ever anyone asked me what I missed about the States my first answer was always my best friend. We see each other every single day during school and especially during basketball and soccer season. She's been my life saver, hug-giver, listener, and she's been there for me when I just wanted everyone else to leave me alone. I could never have had a greater blessing in my life. So Xannie my fellow white girl (hehe) I love you and I've missed you!


iTunes: Lo que Paso, Paso by Daddy Yankee

The Heart of a Child

I went to the zoo more times this summer than I have in a really longtime. I went when I was in London with 3 of the kids I was living with and then again with my two younger siblings after coming back to the states. In a time of my life where so much is up in the air and people start refering to me as an adult (which totally and completely FREAKS me out!) it was great to be able to go back to some place as simple as the zoo. I spent so much time there as a little kid and still I become excited about things like the otters swimming close to the glass or charging around an exibit with my little sister trying to find the tiger cubs.

These pictures are two of my favorites of the kids from when I was in London. The first is on our walk through Regent's Park on the way to the zoo and the second in the aquarium portion of the zoo. I love that one especially because it's so hard to get a candid picture of this little girl! Like most 3 year old girls she LOVES having her picture take so as soon as a camera is even in sight she gets the biggest (and sometimes very cheesy) smile on her face. I snapped this one when she didn't notice I had the camera out because she was so interested in the different colored fish.




iTunes: I believe by Franka Potente on the Run Lola Run Soundtrack

Avoiding the Wave

Since Anna's been posting some pictures of the North Carolina beaches I thought I'd add this one into the mix. Everyday the pelicans would be out watching us as we sat, swam or in my case slept on the beach. I told my youngest sister that they were watching HER. :-P

iTunes: When You've Gone by Avril Lavigne

A little one

"Even the smallest person can change the course of the future."
-Galadriel in Lord of the Rings, The Fellowship of the Ring

If you must know

I actually prefer playing in a 1-3-3-2-1 it shakes things up a bit.


iTunes: Waiting on the World to Change by John Mayer

Hide and Seek

IMOGEN HEAP

"Hide And Seek"

Where are we? What the hell is going on?
The dust has only just begun to form,
Crop circles in the carpet, sinking, feeling.
Spin me round again and rub my eyes.
This can't be happening.
When busy streets a mess with people
would stop to hold their heads heavy.

Hide and seek.
Trains and sewing machines.
All those years they were here first.

Oily marks appear on walls
Where pleasure moments hung before.
The takeover, the sweeping insensitivity of this
still life.

Hide and seek.
Trains and sewing machines. (Oh, you won't catch me around here)
Blood and tears,
They were here first.

Mmm, what you say?
Mm, that you only meant well? Well, of course you did.
Mmm, what you say?
Mm, that it's all for the best? Ah of course it is.
Mmm, what you say?
Mm, that it's just what we need? And you decided this.
Mmm what you say?
What did she say?

Ransom notes keep falling out your mouth.
Mid-sweet talk, newspaper word cut-outs.
Speak no feeling, no I dont believe you.
You don't care a bit. You don't care a bit.

Ransom notes keep falling out your mouth.
Mid-sweet talk, newspaper word cut-outs.
Speak no feeling, no I don't believe you.
You don't care a bit. You don't care a bit.

You don't care a bit.
You don't care a bit.
You don't care a bit.
You don't care a bit.
You don't care a bit

Platforms

I love traveling by trains. It's a good thing too because I take the subway and EL train everyday! I've started to like pictures of train platforms. I love thinking about how many trains pass through a station each day carrying hundreds of people to and from work or where ever it is their daily walks of life are carrying them. The top photo is from London and the bottom is in Brussels. I like how the lighting is kind of the same in both pictures and how the shots are from two different directions on the platforms.



iTunes: Break Free by Hillsong

View from the River Thames

Oh London....How I wish I was still there. I guess it's only fair to say that "All good things must come to an end".


iTunes: Bhajo Naam by Aradhna

An ant's perspective

Brussels is such a cool city!! I don't think a lot of people when they consider going to Europe would necessarily have Brussels on the top of their lists. The city is very old but has a modern feel to it also. All of the streets are made of cobblestone and/or marble. This shot is from the town square (many more pictures of the square to come). I like this picture because it captures part of the square from the ground up where most people probably wouldn't view it from.

Wishing you were somehow here again...

You were once my one companion . . .
you were all that mattered . . .
You were once a friend and father,
then my world was shattered . . .

Wishing you were somehow here again . . .
wishing you were somehow near . . .
Sometimes it seemed if I just dreamed,
somehow you would be here . . .

Wishing I could hear your voice again . . .
knowing that I never would . . .
Dreaming of you won't help me to do
all that you dreamed I could . . .

Passing bells and sculpted angels,
cold and monumental,
seem, for you the wrong companions -
you were warm and gentle . . .
Too many years fighting back tears . . .
Why can't the past just die . . .?

Wishing you were somehow here again . . .
knowing we must say goodbye . . .
Try to forgive, teach me to live . . .
give me the strength to try . . .

No more memories, no more silent tears . . .
No more gazing across the wasted years . . .
Help me say goodbye.
Help me say goodbye!

Questions

Who, what, where, when, how, and to what extent? Those were the questions my 4th grade teacher Mrs. Bell used to want us to ask. I can't remember what the context was in which that she wanted us to ask these questions though... Lately I've been asking these questions but not in the context of grammar but rather in the context of my life- Who am I, what am I doing, where am I going with my life, how am I going to end up, and to what extent could I possibly mess things up? I think now because I know the next year holds so much uncertainty I'm asking these questions so much more that I used to. No one can ever know what's in store for them as much as they'd like to think they do but now I know for sure that I have no idea what's going to happen.

Sunrises

"I believe in Christianity as I believe that the sun has risen: not only because I see it, but because by it I see everything else."- C.S. Lewis

Photo taken by me while at Harrow on the Hill.

Joy that seeks me through pain

O love that will not let me go
I rest my weary soul in Thee
I give Thee back the life I owe
That in thine ocean depths its flow
My richer, fuller be

O Light that followest all my way
I yield my flickering torch to Thee
My heart restores its borrowed ray
That in thy sunshines glow its day
May brighter, fairer be

O Joy you seek me through the pain
I cannot close my heart to thee
I trace the rainbow through the rain
And feel the promise is not vain
That morn shall tearless be

O Cross that liftest up my head
I dare not ask to fly from thee
I lay in dust life's glories dead
And from the ground there blossoms red
Life that shall endless be.


My first morning in London this song was sung at the intern meeting I went to after being picked up at the airport. At the time I was majorly jetlagged, tired, hungry, and feeling very numb in many ways. I let the song just wash over me and listened as everyone else sang it. Then about a week later I stumbled on this song again in my iPod. It's an old, beautiful song and while I sat listening to it I had the greatest feeling of peace.

So it begins...

Maybe I shouldn't use a line from a movie which began a huge battle in which thousands of men and creatures died (Lord of the Rings- The Two Towers) to begin my first blog post. I've never really officially blogged much other than the blog that I did for my computer class last year. This will now be my blog and I shall keep it true to it's name- Random Thoughts and Expressions. It could be lyrics from a song, quotes from an author or anyone else, pictures I find online or take myself, or just my needing to vent about life as a seventeen yearold in Philly, living with my family, going to the school I go to and playing the many sports I play. Last week while I was journaling I made a list of things that I want to accomplish in my life. The things on the list varied from seeing my favorite soccer teams playing, bungee jumping in New Zealand, to learning to express how I'm ACTUALLY feeling not hiding it or covering it up. This blog will serve as an aid for that- expressing how I'm feeling and why I'm feeling that way. I don't know if many people will read or comment this blog or find it interesting at all but it's here for me more than anyone else. I hope that it will also help people to learn more about me and to see who I really am.