Waiting...

I wrote the lyrics from the song I posted last time around the frame of my door... Who knows what my parents will say when they discover Red Jumpsuit Apparatus lyrics written in Sharpie marker around the door (kids don't try this at home!) but it's ok... I'll deal with it. I also have Artemis Fowl runes on the wall surrounding the door. Why is it that the door to my room is where I put such things? I think it's because my room has always been my hiding place. I've laughed till tears came to my eyes, sobbed until I couldn't breathe, studied until my eyes felt as if they were going to fall out, hidden there when I had no where else to go, and been at peace there. The door however is the opening into the world. My room maybe my hiding place but it's also my reality. The world, while also real, is a harsh cruel place and I know that better than anyone. The door from my safe haven opens onto something that has no shelter or protection... With all my exams I haven't really been studying at home. I've been going to Barnes and Noble or Starbucks for hours and hours at a time. Why? Because my safe haven has been invaded. It's no longer a place for me. It's contaminated by the harsh, cruel outside. I can't focus or relax while in my room anymore. There no longer is my door protecting me from the big, bad outside. It's now me standing amongst it all, but I'm not alone.